Any way, we got there in one piece, Alyssa rambled on into the kitchen, and I proceeded to try and get Joshua all signed in to wrestle. Last year my husband had done all this because I was gone to visit my daughter, so I wasnt entirely sure what to do. I had no idea what class he was in, so with Joshua in tow, I went from table to table several times trying to find out where he was supposed to sign in at. After a trip around the mats we finally tracked down the table for his class. Now I don't really know alot about wrestling so this is all pretty new to me. We did manage to get it all taken care of and off to the weight room we went.
In the weight room, my composure started to crumble, not that I was all that composed to begin with, just what little I had went out the door in a hurry. For the previous week I had Joshua on a "diet" of sorts to make sure he would come in below 65 pounds. For some reason I had it in my mind that he would be in the same class he was in last year. Needless to say this did not happen. We stripped him down and put him on the scales and he came to 64.2 pounds, I was like good job, he is under 65 yippee! Unfortunatly, this year, he was put in the Schoolboy class and the lowest weight class on the paper was 70 pounds, at least that was my impression. Knowing nothing about wrestling, and only looking at the paper, I assumed he would be wrestling kids from 70 to 75 pounds, thats like 4 pounds up to 10 pounds more than he was, I was not happy. I was like are you sure he is in this class, there isnt anyone under 70 pounds for him to wrestle? Then I made the huge mistake of saying outloud, to the weigh-in coach, with my son standing there, "he is gonna get clobbered". This is not a very good confidence buidling comment for young men, and was only the first mistake I made for the day. I immediatly marched over to where our coach was and proceeded to complain outloud to him about the unfairness of the situation, that was mistake number 2. Our coach just happens to be the pastor at my church and now knows that I do not handle sports well.
Yes, for years now I have harbored the terrible secret that all though I am not a sports fanatic, I do tend to get a little, intense, for lack of a better word. Well the secret is now out, I am a maniac when it comes to my kids and sports. Maybe this is why I have a tendancy to "Just Say No" when the kids ask me if they can play some sport all thier friends are participating in. It has been easier this way. I remember a couple times during baseball season with Caleb, when Im sure they would have asked me to leave if I hadnt calmed down a little. I do not do sports well, this is why my husband wont let me watch football, which is the only sport I really like. I spent the rest of the day in a bit of a tizzy, Im glad our coach was working the mats and the kitchen so he couldnt see my attitude most of the day. It didnt stop there though, not only did I get upset about things with my kid, I got upset about things for our other team kids also. I have a tendancy to be somewhat protective of the kids who are on the team, I did that during baseball also. You would think after my baseball years I would know better then get involved in sports again.
Well, we sat there most of the day, as Joshuas class is almost the last class to wrestle, so I had the whole day to sit and stew and be perturbed. I am truly surprised Brian didnt tell me to go home at some point, I would have if I were him. Finally they call Joshuas weight class, I have no idea how I understood what they were saying as the person speaking in the microphone seemed to have it half way in his mouth everytime he spoke. Reminded me a bit of Charlie browns teacher. They had thier little meeting and out they came, and I missed it all. I missed his first match because I couldnt find him in the crowd (see picture above). When I did find him it was all over and he had lost, then I thought he had wrestled without a coach and was upset again. I stomped my way around the mats and found Brian of course, once again proving that I do not handle sports well. My attitude had deteriated to the point where I think I actually wanted to smack someone. This is not a good place for me to be. Not that I would actually do that or anything, but the feelings were there for all to see.
Anyway, everyone knew I was upset now, not that I was trying to do that or anything. I was not gracious or kind or sweet or any of the things God would have me be, so I determined right then I would be better next time. Joshua was immediatly affected by my poor sportmanship and I was not feeling to good about myself either at that point. We waited for his next round of wrestling, I followed him to the room, then watched for him to come out so that I would know where he was, then followed him to the mats. I made sure he had a coach, and proceeded to explain to him that he needed to kill the other guy. Not literally, mind you, just no Mr. Nice guy, this isnt practice, this is not play time. I dont know what came over me, John was very patient with me and I moved out of the way, which is very hard for a maniac sports mom to do. Joshua didnt win that match but at least he didnt get pinned that time. I was very proud of him.
By this time my husband had shown up to help with moving the mats after the tournament and I was able to get a little balance, not much, but a little. He can be a stablizing force for me when no one else can. He kept me calm for the most part the rest of the time I was there. I only had maybe 2 more episodes after that, both of which my husband pointed out to me, where not good for Joshuas moral or confidence. He walked into his last match already feeling defeated because of my attitude. I tried to change it but the damage was already done. I determined that I would not do the same thing at the next match in Kellogg, and for the most part I was ok. I did have a minor melt down when we went in to weigh him and they made us get out of line to clip his nails, which I thought were fine. That took another 20 minutes to get done, so I walked out with a bit of an attitude, again. I don't know why I cant just be mellow about this stuff. My husband calmed me down mostly and I dont think I had any other melt downs that day, I was rather intense though and worried about everyone elses kids getting to the mats ect. but for the most part I handled the Kellogg match much better than the St Maries match which is a very good thing.
Our next match is in Sandpoint, one of those get up at 3am to get there by 7am matches so we will have to see how well I handle that. Hopefully I will just sleep through the whole thing and not have to worry about being a bad sport or getting upset. My husband handles these things way better than me, and Joshua will benefit from his calming influence. My prayer will be that I will be more supportive and less uptight and that I would be able to encourage my son to do the best he can and have fun. I think I should probably pray before I leave the house next time, and not wait till I have a fit. I hope my son will forgive me one day and be able to walk away from this experience with alot better attitude then I have had so far.
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